Parents and Coaches

If your eight-year-old is the weakest player on the team—or even in the league—please do not get discouraged. There is plenty of time to grow, especially when a child truly loves the game. And if your child is currently the best player, try not to get too far ahead. Where children stand today does not predict the athletes they will eventually become.

The early years should be about learning the fundamentals and building confidence. Bigger and stronger children may dominate when they are young, but eventually size alone is not enough. Skills, effort and confidence begin to matter more. Improvement takes time, and some athletes do not reach their full potential until they are seventeen or eighteen.

Around age thirteen, sports naturally become more focused. Families may begin preparing an athlete for middle school and high school opportunities, and a greater commitment can make sense. But that commitment should grow from a strong foundation and a lasting love for the game—not pressure to succeed too soon.

I am not perfect, and I have never pretended to have every answer. I simply believe in working hard, trying your best and staying the course. Every child is built differently and develops differently. Some people will understand this message, while others may not—and that is okay.

Most importantly, talk with your children. Ask how they are feeling, how hard they are practicing and how many months of the year they are committed to one sport. Rest is good. Playing multiple sports is good. Let them meet new families, make friends, enjoy the ride and go for pizza after the game. Sports may intensify as they get older. For now, keep encouraging them, keep communicating—and keep smiling.